Every girl dreams of the man in her dreams. The prince and shining armor. The one who will rescue her from the old and wicked witch. Even I dream of it. But now I’m starting to have second thoughts. What if I do actually get in a relationship. This won’t really happen since my parents will never allow this. But what IF I do get into a relationship with someone? I might be the one who will dump him. I thought about this last night. To have a relationship, you must keep in contact and hang out a lot. Well for me, this relationship contradicts literally my whole entire life. I have homework and other things to care about. My parents are strict and wouldn’t allow us to go shop alone. Unless shopping is with them. How will this relationship work? Parents: the barriers to true love of two young people. How tragic. No shopping or hanging out? No form of talking because your grandmother says you’re talking on the phone too much? Or they call when you’re doing your homework? This relationship will suck and will eventually end in the first 24 hours. Lasting for more than 48 hours would be a miracle. My dream of having a wonderful boyfriend who I can talk to was shattered yesterday when I realized that my whole notion of having a boyfriend was contradicted. It was ended when I realized my commitment towards him will be nothing. Nothing at all. Homework > Boyfriend. Nothing more to say.
It was a bummer to realize this. After dreaming about all that boyfriend crap for most of my whole life. Now, it’s gone. Because right now, all I care about is keeping my grades up and cheering up my parents. Having a boyfriend will become a enemy towards my grades, therefore, making my parents unhappy. I want to live up to my parents standards. Probably because its an Asian family thing. Or maybe it’s just our family, our weird and abstract family.
And what if I can have a boyfriend. What if homework is not effected by having a boyfriend? I admit, I have never had a relationship with a guy. I have never kissed anyone (YET) nor held hands with them. I’m clueless about the opposite sex. I am NOT experienced. No expertise at all. Nada. Zipo. And, no, not that way you creeps. I would not know how to react. I would not know what to talk about. I am a newbie at love. That relationship would be terrible.
But, you know, not having a boyfriend isn’t so bad. I realized that I do not have the commitment to have a relationship with a guy yet. And I don’t need a relationship this early. And even if I could get one, I wouldn’t get one now. Living single, you can gain much more freedom and control of your life. And I’m not the type to stay committed; I am young and indecisive. Too much stress to deal with relationships; I’ve already heard too much about my friend’s relationship and love.
